#11: Rasaja Wolfe - on Ember & Flame, Lord Of The Rings, Evocation and the Ultimate Adventure
Rasaja Wolfe is a debut author from Seattle, Washington. In her first book, Ember & Flame, a brand new collection of original poetry, Wolfe lays bare her own journey of self-reclamation through free verse. Wolfe discovered her poetic voice at an early age, using words as a means of expression and introspection. Born from her reverence for the human experience, Wolfe invites readers to delve into the depths of their own hearts and discover the beauty in the seemingly mundane.
Socials
Click here to find OTHER EPISODES | LINKS | TRANSCRIPTION | EXTRA SHOW NOTES
Let me know what you think about this show by sending me feedback on twitter @killah_cortez
Note: This episode was recorded on 11.7.23
This episode of The Killah Cortez Show is brought to you by New Monkey Studio
ABOUT KILLAH CORTEZ
Killah Cortez is a music producer, musician, and songwriter based in Los Angeles. Specializing in alternative/indie/pop, Cortez is richly creative with a remarkable gift of enhancing projects and taking listeners on a journey.
Cortez has also landed reviews from The New York Times, Rolling Stone, Lyrical Lemonade, and Paste Magazine with his compositions appearing in commercials and tv shows like "Younger".
Stream My Music
Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/artist/2XyT84jYqDCTYwzsBTyPla?si=YJsbDxnlRQeWBnKG54g-dg
Follow Killah Cortez
Merch: https://killah-cortez.myshopify.com/
Twitter: https://twitter.com/Killah_Cortez
IG: https://www.instagram.com/killahcortez/
Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/c/KillahCortezShow
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/KillahCortez
Tik Tok: https://www.tiktok.com/@killahcortez
Discord: https://discord.gg/JFpd6RJTFv
“Songs For The Apocalypse” Playlist On Spotify
LINKS | TRANSCRIPTION | EXTRA SHOW NOTES
"Women Who Run with the Wolves"
Demons of Magic by Gordon Winterfield
TRANSCRIPT
Killah Cortez: Welcome back to the Killah Cortez show. The following is an interview with Rasaja Wolfe. Rasaja Wolfe is a debut author from Seattle, Washington. Wolfe discovered her poetic voice at an early age, using words as a means of expression and introspection borne from her reverence for the human experience. She invites readers to delve into the depths of their own hearts and discover the beauty in the seemingly mundane. In her first book, Ember & Flame, a brand new collection of original poetry, Rasaja Wolfw lays bare her own journey of self reclamation through free verse. Before we get started, a little KC news, I just wanted to say thank you for all the love and support on the songs I've put out over the past few weeks. We've hit over a thousand shazams this past month and it's a little mind blowing. It's a little big number, but it just feels like a modest benchmark for how far this project has come. Rasaja Wolfe has been a friend of mine for a few years now, and earlier this year, I had the honor of being one of the test readers for her debut book, Ember & Flame, the behind the scenes context that I had of her path and the adversity it took to get this book out, mixed with knowing the kind of outstanding person she is, made her story a potent one, and I'm stoked to get to share a little of that with you in this episode. She's one of the most resilient people I've ever met, and her journey was incredibly inspiring for me personally as I waded through my own challenges this past year. I interviewed Rasaja Wolfe remotely from her home in Seattle. You can find the show notes, links, and a full transcription of this episode in the description below. You can also find a link to the Killah Cortez discord, where we chat all things KC. Sprinkled in between the segments of this episode are songs from my songs for the apocalypse playlist, some of which were chosen by Rasaja Wolfe. You can find the link for this playlist in the description below. And lastly, you can also find this episode on YouTube. However, it will be without the music between the segments. If you like what I do, please be sure to give me a five star rating on Spotify or a follow or a comment on YouTube. Without further ado, enjoy this interview with Rasaja Wolfe.
Killah Cortez: What's the last thing you googled?
Rasaja Wolfe: The last thing I googled was... a Moulin Rouge style bedroom.
Killah Cortez: Nice.
Rasaja Wolfe: I just needed I needed curtains for my bedroom and I needed blackout curtains. And I was like, how can I make this look cool?
Killah Cortez: Yeah. that's the best way? Did you find anything good?
Rasaja Wolfe: Yeah. I mean, it's a lot of, like, deep red velvet,
Killah Cortez: it's your vibe
Rasaja Wolfe: there we got. Yeah, I got some inspiration. So.
Killah Cortez: So you hail from the PNW. Why don't you give listeners a little background on yourself?
Rasaja Wolfe: Yeah. So I currently live in Seattle. I grew up in Olympia, Washington, and, um, yeah, I've done I've been a writer most of my life. I took a break for a few years running from my dreams, lived in LA for a minute for funsies, and. Gosh, I don't know Greg and then wrote a book last year and.
Killah Cortez: I know,
Rasaja Wolfe: And it was great.
Killah Cortez: I know that's that's why we're here. How did you get into writing?
Rasaja Wolfe: Okay, so actually, my, um, my literature teacher in freshman year of high school had us read the Odyssey and I was super into it. And it really inspired a lot of my writing. I just liked the a lot of the words that was used in that specific translation. Um, by Robert Fagles. Okay. Yeah. And then we read Romeo and Juliet and we read Hamlet and. And that all just really inspired me. And I started writing poetry then. And from there I just branched out into into other genres and other types of writing.
Killah Cortez: So you've been writing for a long time, then?
Rasaja Wolfe: Yeah, I'd say I'd say started. You know, I probably started writing even before then. Maybe when I was like. 13. More seriously. Um, but didn't really find my voice until I was probably 14 or 15.
Killah Cortez: Damn. So are there, like, are there hidden books that were hidden in drawers and burned along the way?
Rasaja Wolfe: Um, yeah, actually, yeah, I have a a lot of work that. I don't have any more that I regret getting rid of, because when you're a teenager, you just write some really cringey things and, you know, you go back and read your work and you're like, ew. And and I have a lot of work that I regret getting rid of because they were just musings of a teenage girl. And I did actually salvage some pieces by like, searching at a really old computer at my mom's house that I used when I was younger.
Killah Cortez: Classic.
Rasaja Wolfe: And yeah, I've thought about like maybe later publishing a collection of, like really.
Killah Cortez: the early years.
Rasaja Wolfe: Yeah, exactly.
Killah Cortez: Yeah. Did you, uh, did you get rid of any of them? Like dramatically.
Rasaja Wolfe: Yeah, I like burned one of them.
Killah Cortez: I burned I burned a couple books.
Rasaja Wolfe: Yeah.
Killah Cortez: A couple of books of old songs.
Rasaja Wolfe: It's so sad. It's so sad. I'm like, I just want to, like, go and hug her and be like, hey, you don't need to do that.
Killah Cortez: Yeah, I let I let some pages of songs go in the ocean. Super sad.
Rasaja Wolfe: That's actually kind of sweet. I like hope somebody found it.
Killah Cortez: Yeah, sweet. But then people are like. But you're littering, bro.
Rasaja Wolfe: That's fair. Paper is biodegradable. Maybe, I don't know.
Killah Cortez: Yeah.
Killah Cortez: Your debut poetry collection, Ember & Flame, came out this past July, which I had the honor of going to the release party for. What was the buildup like to your literary debut and what is the aftermath been like?
Rasaja Wolfe: So I, um, I had it in my mind when I wrote. the book or okay, so had written most of the pieces and needed to compile it, and I was like, I want to publish this. Around my birthday. It just has to come out around my birthday. And then I got distracted by this really terrible boy, and I didn't do any of my stuff. And then by March, I had let him go. And so it was crunch time because I was like, crap. Like, I need to actually get serious about this. And so for probably like 2 or 3 months, I was working so hard, like I work a 9 to 5. So I do work normal office hours. And I was I was getting up super early, working on my book before work and then going to work, coming back, going straight back to my desk and working until it was time to go to sleep and.
Killah Cortez: Wow.
Rasaja Wolfe: Yeah. For, for months to like 2 or 3 months. Um. And so. It was like really exciting. There's a lot of push to just get this done so that it could be out in the summer, just because I felt like energetically, it was just a very summery book, and I, I knew that if I didn't publish it in the summertime, it would just not happen until next summer. And I was like, I just need to get this out there. Um, so after I had actually handed the manuscript off to my book designer and formatter, uh, then I got a party plan. And that was really fun and.
Killah Cortez: Great party. Yeah,
Rasaja Wolfe: Yeah. And then it was less stressful and, um. Then we had the party which you were at, and that was amazing and one of the best days slash nights of my life. And honestly, after that I kind of went into hermit mode.
Killah Cortez: You had to recharge, it makes sense. Yeah.
Rasaja Wolfe: Yeah. And it's been, you know, I could have done better with my plan for marketing the book afterward,
Killah Cortez: Who needs marketing?
Rasaja Wolfe: And to be honest. Yeah. And it's been like, you know, it's been okay. Like, I've left a lot of copies around in the city, and I've actually had a lot of clients at work come back and be like, wow, your book was so good. Like they ended up buying a copy and reading it and they loved it. Or I'll hear from other people that's like, oh, someone gave me a copy of your book, and I didn't know like that you did that. And that was so cool. And so a lot of stuff is happening organically, and it's in a couple local bookshops, which is great, and.
Killah Cortez: That's awesome.
Rasaja Wolfe: I've just been yeah, it's been really great. I'm trying I'm trying to let go of the guilt of not like really gunning for the marketing right now because I'm kind of just enjoying the the release of having it out there, allowing myself to slow down and like kind of recharge and get back into my creative space.
Killah Cortez: Yeah, yeah. I mean, these these creative things have such long lives. Like, it's okay if you didn't market it now, because everything you do beyond this is also marketing this. And it's like.Yeah,
Rasaja Wolfe: Yeah, absolutely. But honestly more than, more than any of the, you know, like monetary kickback or like the the feedback from other people is really the change within myself that I really value. It was like the process of putting this story into a book, and then just releasing it and letting it go has opened me up to more like the next phase and the next cycle of lessons that I need to learn. And so I find I'm just so much more clearheaded now in terms of my personal growth. Now that that is a chapter that I've closed on my life.
Killah Cortez: So do you feel like the vulnerability that it took to create this, like now that you've put it out, has almost made you see that like, oh, there's like another level of vulnerability that I can hit now, now that this is out.
Rasaja Wolfe: Yes, it's definitely yeah. It's only made my work more. Raw and more like honest and true. And I'm like. So excited.
Killah Cortez: That's cool. I love that. Yeah, because I feel the same way when I put out songs, especially ones that feel really close to the heart, I'm like, ah, that wasn't that bad. Let's see how far we can go next time,
Rasaja Wolfe: Right? I mean, we're holding back just a little bit. Yeah. And then when you do it, you're like, oh let's, let's do that again. But like. But more.
Killah Cortez: Yeah. We'll jump from higher this time.
Rasaja Wolfe: Yeah.
Killah Cortez: Where does the title "Ember & Flame" originate from?
Rasaja Wolfe: So "Ember & Flame" came from. So the book is kind of essentially a master class in The Wisdom of Fire. It's it was the Element of Fire was a big inspiration for a lot of the pieces. And the symbolism of transformation that fire brings was very important to me. And it felt like that year that I wrote the pieces in the book, um, which I don't know if I've mentioned yet, is a collection of original poetry and mini fictions. So a collection of a lot of different work. But the year that I wrote the pieces in the collection was like Trial by Fire, like it was very much the best and worst year of my life. It was extremely chaotic and ultimately the, you know, can I can I just read you one of the pieces?
Killah Cortez: Yeah.
Rasaja Wolfe: Read one of the pieces,
Killah Cortez: Of course.
Killah Cortez: Yeah. I was going to ask you to read them anyways, but let's just dig right into it. Love it.
Rasaja Wolfe: Okay. I'm just going to read. I'm just going to read the one that's on the back of the book. It's in the it's on the back cover. Okay. And this is kind of, um, the essence of the book. And this will explain better than I can.
Killah Cortez: Let's go. Heres your Costco sample ,guys.
Rasaja Wolfe: All right, guys, this one is called "In Light". I was in Ember and nearly spent glow facing night alone. I feared and wondered the wait until daybreak to bring reprieve from the dark. But as I endured, I began to remember. I was once a fire. Before I was an ember. And then I realized I need not wait for the dawn to be saved. I need only burst into flame. So that's that. Thank you.
Killah Cortez: Yeah. It's interesting because like. I think upon you reading that, I think I just got it for the first time, like thinking about it that way and realizing that like. The the embers after the flame, but it's the it's the process of becoming that. I think I think inherently like I would I would think to start before the flame. So it's cool that you did it that way. I love that,
Rasaja Wolfe: Thank you. Yeah. I mean, I just I guess everyone who's life is a perpetual cycle of death and rebirth and, um, it's one of the biggest lessons I took from. There's this book called "Women Who Run with the Wolves". Um, that I personally think everyone, especially women, should read. But one of the most important lessons it starts out with is like, everything is cyclical and everything is death and rebirth. So it's life, death and life. You're going to feel like you're in a death cycle sometimes where everything is ending and everything is the worst, and you're scared and you don't know what's what's what. And all you have to do is trust that direction is going to find you, and you are going to be shown the way and life is going to come after. And that's such an important sentiment to really like, allow to take a root in you, because we all face dark nights of the soul. And when we're there, it's painful. We don't have to suffer as long as we're willing to trust that we're going to be shown the way and think with embers and with flame. It's like, you know, like if you have a sage, like a bundle of sage and you light it and it's kind of smoldering, and if you blow on it. It starts to like spark, right? So you're adding oxygen to it so embers can turn back into flames, or they can start new fires. Right? But you just need to like it's the trust. It's the oxygen that it bursts back like it was something before. And it can be something again. And sometimes we all feel like that, right?
Killah Cortez: Yeah. Totally. Yeah, that it's funny. I've had this idea actually have it written down as an idea for a future song that, like, life is just a series of trust falls. And, and I had a mentor that she told me that when I, when I first got into the arts that like, she's like, look, when you start like, you're not going to know how you're going to eat in two weeks, and you just have to know that that hand is going to come and you just have to have that faith. And, and that really imprinted, imprinted heavy on me. And so that really resonates with me. And also the thing with the, with the sage. So we burn a lot of sage here in the studio. Yeah. And our walls are pretty much carpet lined. So every time I'm like walking through, I see those little embers. I'm like, no, no no no. Contain. Contain yourself please.
Rasaja Wolfe: The secret ingredient is danger.
Killah Cortez: Yeah. Shall we burn alive? Today we'll see.
Speaker3: Oh, God.
Killah Cortez: Without divulging too much from the collection, what are some sample meanings behind the different sections of the collection?
Rasaja Wolfe: Yeah, absolutely. So there are seven sections in this collection. It. Each section does tell its own story, and then the collection as a whole tells a story as well. So there's um, the first section is called Starlight.
Killah Cortez: Love that name.
Rasaja Wolfe: And thank you. I called it Starlight because it's just another word for sunlight. Sunlight is starlight to me, but didn't want to, like, really lean into this. There's a sun on the front of the cover. Didn't want to be like, you know, lay it on too thick. But starlight is just such a pretty word to me. So starlight is just. It's my. Honestly, it's my favorite pieces in the book. It's the pieces that were. I felt like they just came to me. They didn't. Pretty much every piece in here. There is no editing done. It just my first draft was the way it was, and I didn't feel the need to touch it at all. And those felt like just really light and pretty and a good introduction to the book. So I compiled my favorites in starlight. And it's kind of just like the essence of like. Like how my my mind and soul was during like the best moments of that year. And then at the second section, obsidian is a little bit of a darker tone. They explore artist block and self-doubt, and the sense that one is not living up to their full potential. It leans wistful and melancholy. I would say. Um, and that that story. I think when I started writing the pieces, I was very artistically blocked. I was in this really toxic relationship that I needed to leave, and I was in a place where, like, I wasn't doing anything with my life. I was just existing, and I was ignoring the work, and I was running away from it, and I wasn't writing and I wasn't doing anything. And so I started with the obsidian section because that was the starting place. That's when I was the Ember. I felt like I was dying.
Killah Cortez: I love that because I think, I think a lot. That might be the most relatable section. I think a lot of people feel that way.
Rasaja Wolfe: Yeah, it's it sucks.
Killah Cortez: It does.
Rasaja Wolfe: Yes, it really does. It does. But it's like you said, it's like the trust fall, right?
Killah Cortez: Yeah.
Rasaja Wolfe: It's like you have to trust. Like you just you have to go out there. You should go outside.
Killah Cortez: Well, to to your point is like you have to provide that oxygen. Like it's funny, I was talking to somebody about this just yesterday. He was talking to me about, like, having some difficulties right now. And I just told him I'm like, dude, like, you know, all the things about like, therapy and talking to people and but honestly, you need to play offense like you need to go and just take some actions in your life that you're taking with your own conviction and power. And that's how you bring control back to your life. Um, what about dragonfire?
Rasaja Wolfe: So the third section, Dragonfire is. The name is inspired by my animal totem that I had that year. So every year I choose a spirit animal and it kind of depends. It's it it. They come to me in different ways, but it's really just a way to like focus my, my energy that year into like looking for the lessons. Like I'm always trying to look for the next lesson, like, what am I supposed to learn this year? I have a friend who has like a word of the year and I have an animal of the year, and I have this like spirit animal oracle deck that I'll I'll use a lot, but sometimes it just doesn't come from that. But that year I did pull the Dragon card and I. Yeah. And I realized and it's funny. So I was I was in that toxic relationship I was in, in obsidian. I was super blocked and pull this dragon fire or this dragon card. And I read the description and I knew immediately I was like, I'm going to break up with him this year.
Killah Cortez: Wow.
Rasaja Wolfe: But I didn't like. But then I pushed it down. I was like, no, no, I'm not, I'm not gonna we're getting married. Yeah.
Killah Cortez: Damn.
Rasaja Wolfe: Like, no, that's not real. Like he's the love of my life. I'm so happy in this relationship that I hate so much, you know, like,
Killah Cortez: Oh my God.
Rasaja Wolfe: So. Right. So anyway, so I pulled the dragon card and the year very much became about seeing my true self. And the dragon energy is about seeing all that's kind of the, the. I don't know if mantra is the right word for it, but the dragon is I see all and you cannot hide from your true self if you're seeing all it represents the wisdom of fire, which is destructive and creative and transformative. I knew, I knew that it was going to be a wild ride. So yeah, it was definitely like a lot of the pieces that I wrote during my process of waking up to who I really was and like facing my outer circumstances and exploring how it can feel like working there, resistance and acceptance, and then finally moving to full embodiment of who you are. Um, so Dragon Fire is like very introspective and raw and cathartic. Um, but yeah, it's about like, so if you think of Dragon Fire, it's like it's destructive, but it can be that can be deliverance, right? That can be salvation, that can free you from bondage. So yeah, things dragon fire was facing.
Killah Cortez: Things need to get destroyed in order for things to get rebuilt.
Rasaja Wolfe: Exactly. Exactly. There's. Let's see. How did I say it? The creativity holds power to self self-destruction.
Killah Cortez: Hmmmm? I had a similar thing happen when I read that book "Think And Grow Rich". I think think it was that one. I read that book, and the person I was with at the time was like. I come out to break up with this person, but it hit me like a ton of bricks, hit me like a ton of bricks. Was like same, but like the same exact thing. I'll just like, took way longer than it should have.
Rasaja Wolfe: So wait, how long? How long was it for you?
Killah Cortez: It was like, another year.
Rasaja Wolfe: Oh, no.
Killah Cortez: Yeah, I fought it, fought it pretty hard.
Rasaja Wolfe: I thought it was going to be another year when I. When I settled back into, like, you know, when you're in a relationship that you're not supposed to be in, you know, there's phases where you're like, I hate this. This is just the worst thing ever. And then you just trick yourself into thinking that you're happy and you're like, oh no, I can do this. Like, things are great. Yeah.
Killah Cortez: It's called trauma bonding people.
Rasaja Wolfe: Yeah. And I really thought I could do it for another year at least. I mean, I just thought I could forever. I'm surprised that I didn't with how much I gaslighted myself, but I think I only made it. I think I only waited another, like, 4 or 5 months.
Killah Cortez: Good on you.
Rasaja Wolfe: I topped out.
Killah Cortez: Yeah. No, I let it go too long. But it's all right. Each. Each owned their own path, right?
Rasaja Wolfe: I mean, there's always. I mean, you're there as long as you need to be, right?
Killah Cortez: Yeah.
Killah Cortez: So for the listeners, can can I get you to read one more?
Rasaja Wolfe: Absolutely. Yeah. Which one would you like?
Killah Cortez: So I think I want to hear. Soul fire.
Rasaja Wolfe: Did you want to hear about the rest of the sections?
Killah Cortez: We can save that for the listeners unless you want to. Unless just one you really want to talk about. We want to get them to buy the book.
Rasaja Wolfe: That's fair. I'll just say so. Mirkwood is the the fourth section. And. Uh, I just wanted to say that. So Dragon fire was facing your outer demons, and. Basically learning to set boundaries and create the life around yourself that you want. And once you've created that stability, then it moves into Mirkwood, which is facing your inner demons. So then going being able to go into the shadow realm and inside and then work, being ready to like, strong enough to face your shadow at that point. So. Probably my favorite.
Killah Cortez: Ever watch Scott Pilgrim? Yeah, that's like the the nega-Scott. That's the that's the Mirkwood right there. Where he has to like, fight himself.
Rasaja Wolfe: It's funny that you're not the only person who has said that.
Killah Cortez: Classic. People just love Scott Pilgrim.
Rasaja Wolfe: Right? Okay, so you wanted to hear Soulfire. Yeah. All right. Soulfire. "I see the way time takes a piece of you every day. The way age weighs on your soul. As if each passing year. The fire you have carried. Grows colder. Like a flame at the end of a wick. And I wish I could bear it for you. I wish I could take that fire and place it in a hearth. And watch it grow to its once breathtaking size. Then you would never die. Because your core would burn so bright. I cannot bear it for you. So I carry you as your fire dances. Its final dance. Visible in your eyes are glimmers of your original spark. They whisper of eons you have lived. And of eons your light will still burn. Her eternal embers. May they find me in the next life to."
Killah Cortez: I love that. Um, why don't you go over one more section? Okay. How about. Just because I like the name so much. Hearthfire.
Rasaja Wolfe: So Hearthfire. The fifth and shortest section of the book Hearthfire to me means the human spirit. That's kind of the namesake put with that. I'd thought about just naming the section "The Human Spirit", but it didn't really go with the theme. But Hearthfire being like the heart fire. Like the fire within the heart. Um, it's it's a reference to an earlier poem in the Starlight section. It's tones are, like, mysterious and empowering and kind of dramatic. Um, but yeah, it's just about the human, the indomitable human spirit. Like that feeling of when you feel your most strongest, when you have faced the things that you need to face and you feel very empowered. How you show up when you are in your power is the tone with that section.
Killah Cortez: Was that was that like, um, after your dark season, did you have a moment where you were just like, oh damn, I have arrived. Hearthfire.
Rasaja Wolfe: Oh yeah, I was full dragon at that point. I was like, okay, I get I understand the energy of the dragon now. Like when when someone needs to embody that, it's like. You are all powerful. You are. All seeing. You are seeing all. Um. And it also mean it also tackles like. Other things that are like just basically the human condition. But a lot of it is very much like. I am strong and here I am.
Killah Cortez: That. Yeah. You're not. You're not trying to be something. You just are something.
Killah Cortez: What is a film you wish you made.
Rasaja Wolfe: Like a film that exists? Yeah, currently or Film i wish I had made like ten years ago when I wrote a script for it.
Killah Cortez: Honestly.You can interpret that any way you want. That's awesome.
Rasaja Wolfe: I film my wish that I made. I don't know, that's a weird question.Like.
Killah Cortez: We're getting weird here
Rasaja Wolfe: Any movie, any movie and be like, oh, I wish I wrote that.
Killah Cortez: Yeah, but like the top one, not just any one.
Rasaja Wolfe: The top one. Oh, gosh. Um. Hold on. I wish I wrote the Lord of the rings trilogy.
Killah Cortez: Like the film and the books or just the film. Oh.
Rasaja Wolfe: The film. I mean, it's it's. And that it will never be redone. That's some of the best. The best screenwriting in all of human history.
Killah Cortez: Full disclosure.
Rasaja Wolfe: You hate
Killah Cortez: I didn't like Lord of the rings one.
Rasaja Wolfe: Oh my God,
Killah Cortez: I hated Lord of the rings one. I was, I was young, but still like, I, I remember leaving that theater like I liked all of it till the very end because for some odd reason, like, it felt like this giant build and the last fight felt so like meek. And get it like there was two more to happen and I got it after the fact. I was like, all right, that had to be that way. And yes, it's amazing, but I'm just saying.
Rasaja Wolfe: Okay, well, we can agree to disagree.
Killah Cortez: Oh my gosh.
Rasaja Wolfe: I don't know. I've watched it. I watched the trilogy for the first time when I was in like eighth grade, and immediately I knew this is the best thing that's ever happened to me. I'm going to watch this.
Killah Cortez: Yeah,
Rasaja Wolfe: A hundred more times in a row.
Killah Cortez: Like what? What are your like your favorite themes behind, like, Lord of the rings or like, what do you love about it so much?
Rasaja Wolfe: Gosh, that's a really that's a big question. It's a it's a good question. So I'm kind of a sucker for stories that tell these big like good versus evil stories. Like. Like Star Wars, like Moana, where it's like there's a very clear evil that. People need to kind of like band together to face and think with Lord of the rings specifically. And especially with how it ended. I. There's a YouTuber that made this really great mini documentary on it that put into words my feelings so well, and I do not remember who it was, but they they basically distilled it down to Lord of the rings is talking about how good and evil will always be at odds, but good doesn't necessarily have to win out because evil will always destroy itself. That put it together so well for me. And I'm sorry to the creator who said that, and I, I can't credit you because I don't remember who you are. But thank you for that. Um, because it was just really beautiful and, and and the story was like that kept happening in the trilogy was like, evil would just, like, shoot itself in the foot and, like, ultimately it was just a really beautiful tale of the human spirit of.
Killah Cortez: Yeah. Classic evil trait is just hubris,
Rasaja Wolfe: Right?
Killah Cortez: That's interesting. So it's funny because when I think of you, like, I don't I don't think of you necessarily as like a person who sees things as black and white, like good or good or evil. But those themes are so universal. And I'm the same. Like I shamelessly love like Marvel movies and like any, any kind of movie like that, I just don't know what it is. Sometimes it just it pumps me up. Yeah, I know, like it has sometimes it has like a format or whatever, but I'm like, whatever. This thing just speaks to me in some way.
Rasaja Wolfe: Well, it's funny to me too, because like, I'm also not a black and white person like I there's so many times we'll look at two conflicting things and be like, yeah, both can be true, right?
Killah Cortez: Yeah.
Rasaja Wolfe: But something about the storytelling when it comes to just a classic good and evil. Because and think it's because a lot of us in our personal journeys and our personal mythology, a lot of it does feel like that. Or it feels like we're up against something, like, really monumental.
Killah Cortez: Yeah, I'm a sucker for the hero journey, for sure.
Killah Cortez: If I had to describe you to someone who didn't know you, one of the first descriptors I would use is mystical. What's been your latest obsession in the esoteric realms of the cosmos?
Rasaja Wolfe: So. Um, I've been studying a lot of conjuration and evocation magic lately.
Killah Cortez: Okay. What's that?
Rasaja Wolfe: So conjuration is like calling up a spirit. Or like an entity and evocation is like the same thing. So you're you're calling up. And to be honest, I haven't called up a specific entity yet. I'm still not really there. And to be honest, I've spent the last month kind of. I've been busy falling in love, so I haven't been doing a ton of spellwork. Um, but I've been reading about it and studying it from both a religious point of view and like a pre-Christian and like a early pagan point of view, and searching out texts from different perspectives so I can get a really full view on how like how one would safely. Conjure or evoke spirits and also just try to learn like what, how what the mechanics are of it. And so I've gotten really good at like the ritual opening, like the, the protection spells that you would do before calling in an entity. And I'm sticking with that for now. Yeah.
Killah Cortez: Getting your reps because.
Rasaja Wolfe: Yeah. Well, it's interesting because when you, you can use that as like a primer for any spell, it doesn't have to be like a, an evocation spell. And so I have been doing spells for other people. Um. Like, I've like, one person was being harassed by this guy and I was like, well, I could use some practice. Why don't you send me his name? So. So I used the same ritual opening in one of the books I have, and I used that to, like, charge the spell and then did the spell. And like, the next day, this guy was out of the picture and it was like, that is awesome. And that's so great.
Killah Cortez: Yeah, that's Legolas ish right there.
Rasaja Wolfe: Yeah, that's the goal.
Killah Cortez: What got you interested in in all that?
Rasaja Wolfe: So I really dive deep into my creative projects. I'm a huge fan of thought experiments, and in the novel that I'm writing right now, which there is a chapter one excerpt in the back of my limited edition version of the book, it's not included in the standard. Yeah. So if anyone wants I have a few copies left of the limited special edition, so if anyone does want it, you can hit me up on Instagram and I'll send you a copy. Um, but anyway, so this novel that I'm working on. Um. It does. Can I just read the short description of the novel? This it. Okay. This ties in basically "around the same time I stopped writing for Ember & Flame. I began writing pieces for my second collection, and I also started drafting a novel. I wanted to include an excerpt from the new book. Okay, while that you don't need to hear that currently still unnamed, but with a handful of chapters and concepts fleshed out, this story explores themes of generational trauma and family curses, which follow a group of siblings through childhood and into their adult lives. How does a chaotic upbringing affect siblings differently? How does it affect their relationships with each other? How does it influence the way they perceive and interact with the world? To what lengths will they go to run from the ghosts that haunted their parents and now linger with them? What does it take to face your demons? What do unbreakable sibling bonds look like? How far would one go to avoid leaving a sibling behind?” So those are all questions that I explore with the novel. And one of the mechanisms I use is ghosts and and demons. And so I haven't decided to what extent I want them to be symbolic or real yet in the novel. But, I was thinking about how my sister said when she was a kid and she remembers this. She was like, there was this woman that would sit by my bed and talk to me, and the only word she had to describe it at the time, because we were brought up, Christian was demon. And so I read in this book and I'm like, well, I'm basing it off of my siblings. And my sister had a demon. So I want to learn. I want to learn how to summon a demon, and I want to summon that one. And I want to talk to her and ask her what that's all about. What were you saying to her? Why were you haunting my family? So, yeah. Big thought experiment I'm super into. Just like, you know, method acting. Basically, like going straight into the work and, like.
Killah Cortez: like a realm journalist.
Rasaja Wolfe: Yeah.
Killah Cortez: Um, that's crazy, because I have multiple friends. So one friend, his mom. And she's. She's a twin. His mom, when they were kids, used to see little people at the foot of their bed. Both of them would see it and like, to this day, they're like, you know, older now to this day, like one just straight up has panic attacks when they talk about it. Uh, and then another friend currently has woken up to entities like sitting at the foot of her bed. And sometimes it's like a figure, sometimes it's just a shadow. And then I've had I've had other friends who said like. That they've seen, like shadow people in the corner or whatever. I mean, it's so wild to me because I've never seen that consciously. Like, I think I've had dreams about it. And it's hard to like, tell what's real and what's not. But that's that's super interesting. Yeah. Do you, do you go into that like. What's your feeling going into that? Are you, like, excited? Like a little nervous, a little? All the above?
Rasaja Wolfe: Well, I think that there's a healthy amount of fear. Like if you approach something with respect, a lot of times that will feel like fear. I think that, um, I think we briefly talked about this before, and you mentioned like the term spiritual grizzlies, like there's things that you shouldn't mess with. And I think that's very much true. I was speaking with one of my. One of my other friends who's a he's like a seventh generation guru from India, like, grew up in a monastery. He's a tantric teacher. He knows about a lot of this stuff. Like he studied the spiritualism aspect. And there are demons and angel like demonic and angelic entities in the Hindu tradition as well. And so he was talking to me about this. He basically said the same thing, that there's some things that don't know how to handle themselves. And it doesn't matter how careful you are, just like if you approach a grizzly, it's going to hurt you. And so to be careful what you're approaching. So I'm very careful of, like there's only a specific order of entities that I would be working with. And at the same time, um, there's also a level of we don't know if these things are actually real or if they're manifestations of things in our psyche. And so I think I'm approaching it with a healthy amount of respect.
Rasaja Wolfe: Like I'm definitely there's things that make me nervous. And if I'm scared, then I'm not going to force myself to do anything that I think I'm really uncomfortable with.
Killah Cortez: Yeah.
Rasaja Wolfe: Um, I think that my but at the same time, you know, spiritual teachers will say if something scares you, go toward that because, like, you know, part of part of mine is like, well, I was always raised to be, like, scared of this. And I want I don't want that to control me. And so I want to learn about it. And the more I learn about it, the less afraid of it I'll be. Um, and also, I feel very protected, I feel like. A. I feel like if you approach these things with respect. As opposed to like a mocking in a mocking way. Like if you approach it, um, like, I'm better than you and you can't hurt me and you're just a. You're just a measly thing. It's like, no, these things have been around for thousands of years. Like, just calm down. Like maybe, maybe be nice for a second because all living things are deserving of love, right? I don't know if that answered the question. I just rambled for a really long time.
Killah Cortez: No, I mean, I think my my, my thoughts on it are like the metaphysical and consciousness is. It's. It's a realm that is similar to what? When we explore space, or when they were exploring the North American continent for the first time, like, look at you and you're doing that. And it reminds me of like, a Lewis and Clark explorer. Like you can kind of prepare for all of it and like, talk to some people who might have walked that path before, but truly, you're just going to go through and you know, what's going to happen is what's going to happen. And that's but to me, that's. Brave, but also necessary because I think, at least for me and the studies that I do, it seems like it's a it's a frontier that's being explored more and more. And it's and it's weirdly like all these topics that are like paranormal, metaphysical, that all kind of converging to this one space. So I think it's really interesting that you're doing that.
Rasaja Wolfe: Yeah. It's it's it's fun. It's it's nice to have a focus. I think that at risk of sounding a little arrogant, I. So I have never I haven't had the gift of like seeing it, seeing a ton like don't see a ton of shadow people and don't see a ton of entities I have. It's not like my that's not my gift. My gifts of have been in seeing things in dreams, like getting information in dreams that I would not have been able to get obtain in the real world at all, or remote viewing like finding lost objects that I just know are in a place. I just know where they are and I don't know why. Or more even more like personal based, like empathetic things like being able to feel what someone's feeling without them having to say anything, like very subtle things. And on top of that, um, having kind of a natural shield just with whatever's in my, my soul map is I've been around people and gone with people to places where they've continually been haunted. And whenever I go, there's no harm that happens. So. There's kind of a term for that. There's like, I think I've heard some people call it a shield where there's some people that do have a little bit of a thing in their in their spiritual or energetic makeup. That means that they're a little bit naturally more protected. And that's possible that that's why don't get haunted. And I don't get approached by negative spirits. And if that's true, then then maybe it means that it's a little bit safer for me to go into that space. So.
Killah Cortez: Yeah, that's that's interesting because I. Same like I've been around a lot of people that have seen things. I guess I've seen some UFO stuff, but, um, I always kind of wonder. I've had this thought in my mind recently is like, you ever see a Hook from that movie?
Rasaja Wolfe: No, I did not see that yet. So what happens.
Killah Cortez: Without without spoiling? It is like the whole the whole thing behind it is like Pan loses his belief and he can't. He can't see the things that kids can see. And it's because he doesn't believe it. And like to what you were saying is like, we're not sure if when we travel into these realms that we're traveling through a realm or are we like projecting it, like, is it coming from us? And and I always wonder that like, what if, what if it is just like Pan? And what if it's a hybrid of both? Like, maybe it is real, but you have to believe it's real in order to see it.
Rasaja Wolfe: I was going to say it's so in the book I'm reading called one of the many books I'm reading right now called Demons of Magic by Gordon Winterfield. Is it? Um, he talks about how a lot of the the ritual opening or the protection ritual that you use when you call in the archangels to prepare the space for a summoning of one of these goetic demons? A lot of it has to do with imagination and like. Picturing things and imagining things, and it's very powerful. And it sounds like, you know, weird. It's just it's just your imagination. It's just in your head. I think there's an in-between. I think there's I think it helps you get halfway there. I don't know if that's describing it super well, but. I mean, I personally was like, this is weird. Like, I don't think this is going to work. But like the second time I did the the ritual opening, like the energy in the room shifted and the temperature dropped. So I was like, okay, interesting. This is something happened there. So I think I think it's a hybrid of both. Like you said, I think it's a little bit of us and a little bit of like something that we can't understand yet.
Killah Cortez: Interesting. I could talk about this stuff all day.
Kilah Cortez: What's one thing people would be surprised to hear about you?
Rasaja Wolfe: Usually in my in my normal life, it's that I'm like a sorceress in training.
Kilah Cortez: Well, we already got through. We already got through that. So. Yeah, you know my sit down with that anyways. So. Well, that's.
Rasaja Wolfe: That's what I draw up on the, on the first dates to like, see if people can hang.
Kilah Cortez: You're like So i'm a sorceress.
Rasaja Wolfe: Yeah. I'm like, if that scares you, I'm letting you leave early. You are just like, you can just get out now because it's fine. If it's not for you, that's cool. But just so you know. Um, anyway, yeah, something that would surprise people. Um, I, I was homeless for a bit in 2022 and slept in my car for a few months, and people are kind of mind blown when they hear that, because if anyone, anyone who knew me like, would not have been able to guess. Um, so that's always fun to drop on people.
Kilah Cortez: Yeah. You had a, you had a cool podcast that you shared with me that actually I found I found myself weirdly obsessed with because it's just such a like raw story. And hearing it, it was like watching a really addictive TikTok or something. It was interesting, you know, like, I like binged the whole thing pretty much because you were like already well off, like totally out of that scenario. But so how did that influence the writing of the book, would you say? Like, I'm sure it influenced a bunch of ways, but I guess in review. Yeah.
Rasaja Wolfe: So that my my houseless experience was at the end of the year that I wrote that book. And I went into that experience knowing that I was not going to leave that experience empty handed. I was like, I cannot be homeless and sleeping in my car and not leave with something. And so it forced me to be forced me to turn to my writing and to use that as solace and as comfort during some of the darkest moments of my life. And I, I kind of finished my writing the, the, the content that would go into that book. But then I was like compiling it. So then I spent a ton of time just organizing it and typing everything up from the handwritten manuscripts, because I write everything by hand. Um. And then. Yeah. It was really that that was like the that was the trial. Well, the whole year was trial by fire, but that was like the Crucible. That was like, all right, I'll see what you learned, you know.
Kilah Cortez: Yeah. When, when you were experiencing your homelessness, do you. Those part of it, like conscious where you were like. And knowing that it takes a ton of pressure to turn like a piece of coal into a diamond.
Rasaja Wolfe: Yeah, I was I went into it with a lot of acceptance. And it's not that's not an attitude. I think I could have approached something like that with at any time before that year, because I think that whole year was it was transformative enough to prime me for for the end of that year when I was in my car. Um, and so. I just blanked on your question. Can you repeat it? I'm sorry.
Kilah Cortez: Yeah. No, it's it's like it's like, for example, for me, like, I know I thrive under pressure. And when I like, I have, I have this crazy ass habit where, like, sometimes I'll just come right up against a deadline and I'm like, I don't have to get it done because it helps me focus.
Rasaja Wolfe: Yes. Yep. Exactly. And that's that was I was just viewing it as a test of faith. I was viewing it as like, okay, either I can crumble and I can leave, leave this like with a bad attitude, or I can let this be something that I look back on and see that I turned a really, really shitty situation into a time that I'm really proud of.
Kilah Cortez: It's awesome when you when you look at physical copies of the book. Do you see that vision?
Rasaja Wolfe: That's awesome.
Rasaja Wolfe: I do because because I designed the cover while I was homeless and I it came to me the name and the cover came to me while I was homeless. And so I was like, know what I'm going to do? And so when I look at it, it's like a reminder. It's like, hey, like, look what you did. Like, look where you came from and what you went through.
Kilah Cortez: But I love that.
Killah Cortez: As an author, artist, adventurer, spell caster, explorer. What does the ultimate adventure look like to you?
Rasaja Wolfe: Oh my God. Like anything in the universe.
Killah Cortez: Yeah.
Rasaja Wolfe: Oh my God. The ultimate adventure. Like fun or like, action packed.
Killah Cortez: Whatever you want. Whatever you want it to be.
Rasaja Wolfe: Oh my God, I could talk about this for hours. Okay. I would. Um, I would want to go on some, like, Skyrim style adventure where I'm like having to befriend a dragon and like, go defeat a monster. Like, that would be so terrifying and fun.
Killah Cortez: Real life. What would you have? Like, like like lives. Like in a video game? Or is it just like one life, one adventure?
Rasaja Wolfe: I mean, if being able to respawn is an option, can we add in double jump?
Killah Cortez: Yeah, yeah. You get one or the other. Respawn or double jump?
Rasaja Wolfe: Oh no. Respawn. I'll take nine lives, please.
Killah Cortez: That would be so sick if you could respawn. What's the first thing you would do if you could respawn, like in real life right now?
Rasaja Wolfe: Oh, God. I would, I would like. I would try and with like without any previous experience, I would just try and summit Mount Everest without an oxygen tank. And then if I successfully do it, Mega clout. Yeah, but if I die. It's good.
Killah Cortez: See, you're giving yourself the option of maybe living. My brain went straight to like, dude, you're skydiving from space. No helmet right into the ground. Just like using up the life.
Rasaja Wolfe: But wait, why? That doesn't make sense. Because you will have the same experience with the proper equipment. This is true. This is true. It doesn't change the skydiving.
Killah Cortez: That's a good point. That's a that's a good point. All right, I will wear a suit straight into the ground. Oh my God. Um. What? Oh. What advice would you give to your 20 year old self?
Rasaja Wolfe: Sorry.
Killah Cortez: You're imagining the cratering. I see it, I'm going supersonic.
Rasaja Wolfe: oh No, the the, like cartoon character.
Killah Cortez: The light turns from like, from, like, amber to blue to green as it, like, plunges right straight in. I'm going to land in New Mexico.
Rasaja Wolfe: You're going to start like an earthquake.Like,
Killah Cortez: Oh, shit. I'm gonna destroy a city by accident
Rasaja Wolfe: Like at that velocity. Like not slowing down.
Killah Cortez: I still do it
Rasaja Wolfe: All right, all right, all right. What advice would I give my 20 year old self? Um. I would. You know, I don't know if I would give her advice so much as I would sit down with her and be like. Hey. Like you're. You're good enough. And I would just think I would just tell her it's going to be okay, and I would just hug her and tell her that. Like she's enough and she's lovable and yeah, just the things she needed to hear.
Killah Cortez: I like that. Um, I just have a few more questions for you. What should I have asked you but didn't?
Rasaja Wolfe: Oh, um. You know, that's not a question I was prepared for. Um, where where can you find my book?
Killah Cortez: That's coming. Two questions from now. Okay.
Rasaja Wolfe: Um. What is my top album of the year?
Killah Cortez: Okay. What's your top album of the year?
Rasaja Wolfe: Okay, so I'm so glad you asked.
Killah Cortez: I thought of it myself
Rasaja Wolfe: My my favorite. I have a I usually have, like, a favorite album every season. And this summer I stumbled across Emma Rosa's album sting. And I may have actually sent it to you, but it's like this whole 80s throwback vibe. It's so good. I know it's cliche to really like 80s throwback sounding music right now, but I don't care. That album iconic, it's so good. Everyone listen to it.
Killah Cortez: Well, yeah, there's going to be songs interspersed on this and I'm sure we're going to throw some Emma Rosa on there.
Rasaja Wolfe: Yeah.
Killah Cortez: Um, any ask a request from my audience or any last parting words?
Rasaja Wolfe: Yeah. I would say if you're interested in my book, feel free to check it out on Amazon under you just search for Rasaja Wolf or Ember & Flame and it'll pop right up. I would love to connect with you on Instagram. I'm Rasaja Wolf on Instagram. Um, and I do have limited edition copies of my book left. You can just DM me. Those are not available online. And yeah, if you if you are experiencing a dark time or, or you are uncertain or you're scared, I promise that the light is coming and you just need to trust that you will be shown the way.
Killah Cortez: Get that trust fall. Rosa, thank you so much for coming on the KC show. I appreciate it, and I appreciate you so much. And we'll be talking to you soon.
Rasaja Wolfe: Sounds good. Thank you for having me.
Killah Cortez: Once again, thank you to Rasaja Wolfe for coming on the show. Go check out her debut book, Ember & Flame. A link to the book on Amazon and Kindle is in the description. You can find other episodes of the Killah Cortez show, my socials, show, notes, links, and a full transcription of this episode at the Killah Cortez Show.com. You can listen to my music, buy some merch, or show your support over at Killah Cortez dot com. You can also show support for the show by giving us five stars or Spotify or a like or a comment on YouTube. Thank you for listening. And until next time, adios.